-Originally aired September 18, 1989.
-Your hosts are Gorilla Monsoon & Bobby Heenan in Studio A, and Rowdy Roddy Piper in Studio B. Gorilla can’t even finish sentence #1 of his intro without a shouting match emerging, and Gorilla has to tell both of them to shut up to get the show started.
ULTIMATE WARRIOR (Intercontinental Champion) vs. BOB BRADLEY
-Bradley tries to attack from behind and Warrior just catches him and launches him clear over the top turnbuckle and drives him into the timekeeper’s table. Warrior is still wearing his table belt and he just drives Bradley’s face into his own crotch for additional damage. Commentators try to use Jedi mind powers to convince us that it was his chest.
-We get words from Andre, who promises to get the title back, for the family. Back tin the ring, Warrior splashes Bradley for the three-count, and then stuffs him underneath the ring for safe keeping.
-We rewatch Brother Love’s hygiene lesson last week and Rick Rude’s surprise attack on Roddy Piper. Rick Rude declares it the last laugh and considers it a settled issue. We get a rebuttal from Piper, who makes it a point to cut his promo with one eye still shut.
“The Million Dollar Man” TED DIBIASE (with Virgil) vs. GARY WOLFE
-Virgil offers Wolfe a few hundred bucks to just forfeit and call it a night, but Wolfe has pride and surprises DiBiase with an attack. Surprising that they’d give a jobber a spot like that. DiBiase rallies and snaps Wolfe’s neck, softening it up for Shane Douglas.
-Jake The Snake drops in with some menacing words. Meanwhile, DiBiase connects with a double axehandle, and the Million Dollar Dream ends it.
-Back in Studio A, Gorilla mentions that Studio B has suddenly been closed off because WWF officials asked for a private meeting with Piper. Gorilla suspects that Piper is about to announce that he’s coming fully out of retirement, which makes The Brain a bit nervous.
-And we’re doing something rare this week. A match has an actual issue behind it, so we flash back to Ronnie Garvin’s refereeing days, when he drew Dino Bravo’s ire by actually enforcing rules and giving a jobber the win by DQ.
KOKO B. WARE vs. GREG RILEY
-Damn, that new theme just feels so right. Tony insists that they stop commentary for a bit to listen to it, and we get pre-taped words from Koko just cutting a promo about how much he loves his new theme. I think this lends credence to the WWF floating interest in “The Wrestling Album III” at this point. Just a squash, and Koko gets the win with the ghostbuster.
-We flash back to Ronnie Garvin sharting all over Greg Valentine at SummerSlam, which leads to…
GREG “The Hammer” VALENTINE (with Jimmy Hart) vs. BOBBY MUNICE
-Valentine pounds and chops away at Munice. We get pre-taped words from Valentine, who’s steaming at Garvin still.
-Suplex and an elbow by Valentine. Figure four finishes.
-So they’re reshaping the angle now to say that Valentine DEMANDED reinstatement, which is how they should have framed this to begin with.
-The Hart Foundation vows that they’ll live forever, and Sensational Sherri is FUMING about how Hulk Hogan had to hide behind a woman at SummerSlam because he just can’t beat Randy Savage one on one.
-We learn that Studio B has been reopened, and Piper has changed into a track suit. For training.
RICK MARTEL (with Slick) vs. TERRY DANIELS
-Martel works the arm as the crowd launches into a “Tito” chant. Terry Daniels tries a hiptoss, but Martel counters with a prototype chokeslam. Backbreaker by Martel, as we get pre-taped words from Martel, who declares himself the sexiest man in the WWF and thinks he should become a model. Hey, that’s an idea!
-Boston crab gets the submission, but Martel quickly releases the hold and grabs the referee’s arm and stops him from calling for the bell just so he can drop a knee from the top rope. And he settles for a three-count. Turn out the liiiiiiights, the party’s overrrrrrr.
-Jake “The Snake” Roberts is back. Creative insult by Jake, who calls Brother Love a jukebox, because when someone sticks money in him, he keeps singing for them. Jake is willing to declare permanent injury and even prison to get his revenge. Jake drops a neat bit of character info here, saying that when somebody pisses him off to the point that he becomes obsessed, and in the middle of a long rant, he slips in that he would ignore the cheers of the fans and go his own way if somebody got him angry enough. So there you go, there was still a bit of evil in him, all he needed was for someone to bring it out at the wrong moment. Jake closes by saying he was so severely injured that he may only have one DDT left in his body, and he’s saving it for Ted DiBiase.
RUGGED RONNIE GARVIN vs. DINO BRAVO (with Jimmy Hart)
-Dino shows off before the match by doing push-ups with Jimmy Hart sitting on his back, which would be paid off in an unexpectedly big way eventually.
-Bravo unleashes a variety pack of offense, mowing Garvin down with a shoulderblock, a chop to the throat, and a side headlock. Garvin fights back with chops of his own and a sweep of the leg, and Bravo gets out of there for a moment. Garvin gets tired of waiting and drives punches into the top of Bravo’s head from inside the ring. Back in, Bravo comes back with a back suplex, and either he legit knocked the wind out of Garvin or he’s a hell of a seller. Bearhug by Bravo, but Garvin slumps back into the ropes to force the break quickly.
-Hands of stone leads to the world-famous Garvin Stomp, but Greg Valentine interrupts with a surprise attack before Garvin can finish it, and Hart’s boys gang up on Garvin. Detective Alfred Hayes suspects this was a planned attack. It was actually pretty good while it lasted.
-The Powers of Pain demand a match with the Bushwhackers, and we get comments from Dusty Rhodes in his rarely-seen red & yellow combo.
COLISEUM CORNER: HONKY TONK MAN (Champion, with Peggy Sue & Jimmy Hart) vs. BRUTUS “The Barber” BEEFCAKE
-As seen on “Wrestlemania’s Greatest Matches.” Joined in progress as Honky goes to the floor and complains to the referee about the offense. Back in, Honky goes after the eyes, but can’t take advantage and Beefcake fires him into the turnbuckles. High knee by Brutus and Honky goes to the floor to regroup. Beefcake goes for a backdrop, Honky tries to counter with a kick, but Beefcake anticipates and gets out of the way. Honky mounts a comeback and puts the boots to Beefcake. Snapmare and a fistdrop by Honky. He stomps away at Brutus and Jimmy Hart steps in to offer a choke behind the referee’s back. A truly silly spot sees Honky go for the Shake, Rattle, & Roll in the middle of the ring, but he’s not happy with it and brings Brutus over to the ropes to do the move, and naturally, Beefcake uses the ropes to break it. To see the thrilling cop-out finish, buy the video!
AKEEM (with Slick & Big Boss Man) vs. MARK FREAR
-Boss Man is here because he’s suspicious that Dusty might come to the ring for any match involving himself OR Akeem. We get more words from Dusty Rhodes, taunting Boss Man crying over his “toys” being taken from him.
-Akeem fat-guys Frear around, and a big splash finishes quickly. Turn out the liiiiights, the party’s overrrr.
-Rockers threaten to send the Rougeaus packing.
TITO SANTANA vs. WIDOW MAKER
-Time limit draw. Calling it.
-Armdrag by Tito to get started on the right foot. Barry gets dirty right away and goes for the eyes, but an elbow misses and Tito is mad about the chicanery. This is the very definition of what Vince McMahon would call “seesaw match-up back and forth” as they trade moves for a few minutes with neither guy being able to string them together for an actual advantage. Barry retreats to the floor and drags Tito out by the ankles, but Tito keeps putting up the fight and even blocks an attempted barricade shot.
-Back in, Windham gets a reverse atomic drop on Tito, but he does another one and Tito no-sells it, then dropkicks Barry to the floor. Back in, Tito tries to finish with a sleeper, but Barry breaks it with a stunner. Abdominal stretch by Windham, with a grasp of the ropes for leverage, and he blames the cameraman when he gets caught.
-Back from the break, Barry shows authority with lasting consequence, according to Lord Alfred. Knee to the head by Barry, and I hate to say it but this is just laying there and dying with the live crowd. Barry goes to the top rope but gets Flair-slammed. Tito can’t capitalize though, crashing on a corner charge. Powerslam by Barry, who is practicing “conversation of energy” per Alfred (he’s taking a 10-second break between moves). Tito just suddenly springs up and applies a figure four out of nowhere.
-Barry fights it and applies a sleeper of his own. Referee catches him using the ropes again, so the break is forced and they collide on a double shoulderblock and both men are down. Tito throws an Irish whip that sends Barry tumbling over the top rope, and Tito follows him out and rams him into the post. Suplex gets two. Flying forearm connects–and the bell sounds. I am a wizard. These two didn’t gel the way you’d expect them to and it took about ten minutes for it to get rolling.
0 – 0.9
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5 – 5.9
Not So Good
6 – 6.9
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9 – 9.9